Soulmates
26
Interruption
Jaime and Keira and Trayce
JAIME AND KEIRA talked to Trayce frequently through the week, but they agreed that when they got together, they would not simply rush to bed as soon as they could. Trayce had even more of the fears regarding her first time than was typical among the other teens Keira and Jaime had listened to.
They were very different than Keira’s fears. Keira—and Jaime to a somewhat lesser degree—feared being subsumed by the mind of the other and losing their own identity. Trayce had no such compunction. Her lower level of psychic activity led her to discount the idea of other voices. Her stalwart belief that Keira and Jaime were only characters she imagined made it impossible for her to consider that she might lose her own identity in their relationship.
«You haven’t been, like, stalking me, have you?» she asked on Tuesday.
«The only time we attempted to see you was that afternoon after your class at Rose CC,» Keira said. «We’re sorry about that one. We thought if we showed you we were real, you’d be as excited as we were.»
«I was totally freaked out! Inside, I didn’t want to run away, but I couldn’t help myself. But you didn’t come back to the school?» Trayce asked.
«No. Never,» Jaime said. «We promised we wouldn’t try to see you if you didn’t invite us. Why?»
«I’ve just had the oddest feeling I’ve been watched the past couple of weeks. I mean, not just in my head. Like someone literally has eyes on me. I stayed in the classroom at Rose for an extra hour after class let out and left by a different door. But even going to school or picking Mom up at work has made me a little uncomfortable.»
«We promise it’s not us,» Keira said.
«But don’t take the feeling lightly,» Jaime admonished. «We know there is someone out there who is hunting for head talkers. I’ve encountered him twice, and Mr. Angus chased him away from the grocery store once. He isn’t a good guy.»
«Wait! Mr. Angus? The old detective I wrote about?» Trayce said. «That’s ridiculous. You can’t possibly know about that story.»
«We don’t know anything about your story, but he and his two friends often walk in the same park we do. He’s a detective and also a head talker. He agreed to keep an eye out,» Keira said.
«You’re making it harder to believe in you,» Trayce laughed. «He’s an old man with two strippers for friends and he imagines he carries a sword in his cane.»
«It’s a real sword,» Jaime said. «But hey! We don’t need to discuss him. Just be careful and watchful when you’re out and about. This stalker fellow is definitely out there.»
«Yeah. Okay.»
«If you show up,» Trayce said when they talked Christmas Eve, «I’m going to need some time to adjust to your physical presence. You see each other every day. I’m just out here alone with you in my head. No matter how much I desire you and imagine what it will be like to make love to both of you, bringing my physical body into the equation is going to take some time.»
«We agree, precious,» Jaime said. «It’s one of the reasons we’ve taken so much time with each other. I mean, if desire was all that was needed, Keira and I would be naked and making love right now.»
«Well, maybe not while my parents are in the living room,» Keira laughed. «But as soon as we could get alone.»
«What I don’t understand is that I want… Well, I want you as much as I want Jaime,» Trayce said. «I’m not the least bit homosexual. At least I don’t think so. I’ve never met another woman I wanted so much. It’s one of the things that makes me believe you are really just a part of me I made up. I have no qualms about playing with myself.»
«Ached for,» Keira said. «I’ve looked in on other girls’ fantasies and enjoyed using the fantasies for myself. I’ve imagined myself being them, or occasionally being with them. But with you, gender seems irrelevant. I just love you and want to be with you.»
«Keira, please don’t jump to that. You make my heart beat faster and I want to say I love you, too. But I really need to see you with my own eyes. I just can’t say I love you before I know beyond a shadow of a doubt you are real.»
«I wish it was Friday,» Jaime sighed. «I want to take your hand and let you truly see inside me.»
Keira and her parents went to Jaime’s house for Christmas dinner. Jaime had volunteered to cook, but was relegated to setting the table as David and Olivia took control of the kitchen. Keira had come early ‘to help.’ She and Jaime escaped to the TV room to kiss and wish Trayce a Merry Christmas.
«Merry Christmas to you, too,» Trayce said. «But please don’t get carried away with making out and stuff today. Mom and I are going out for Christmas dinner and she insisted we get dressed up for it. Do you like my dress?»
Trayce spun in front of a full-length mirror and the other two caught their breath as they saw the beautiful girl. The only other time Trayce had given them a mirror image of herself was when she posed naked the night Jaime had been injured.
«You are breathtaking,» Jaime said.
«Girl! Where did you get that dress? And does it come in green?» Keira asked.
«Yeah… Don’t you like the red?»
«It’s perfect on you. It brings out the color of your eyes. I’m afraid it would clash with my hair, though. I would never in a million years imagine I’d fall in love with a blue-eyed blonde! Of either sex.»
«I’m not blond,» Jaime said. «I don’t think the dress would do anything for me, though. I mean, not if I was wearing it.»
«You’re so silly sometimes, Jaime. I really like that about you,» Trayce said.
«I’ll keep that in mind.»
«Oops! My parents just arrived. We need to go upstairs and be sociable,» Keira said.
«Yeah. I think Mom’s ready to leave for dinner. Merry Christmas to both of you. If we happen to all be in bed at the same time tonight, that would be great!»
«Merry Christmas, Trayce. If you are there, we will be, too.»
The Families
“So, how are you planning to spend the next few days of your winter break,” John asked Keira and Jaime at the dinner table.
“Oh, we thought we’d just spend it in bed together,” Keira shot back.
“Keira!” June exclaimed.
“How about if we’re just occasionally there?” Keira asked.
“I’m trying to think of ways to ground an eighteen-year-old,” David growled.
“I didn’t say anything!” Jaime signed. Everyone laughed.
“Well, since you don’t like that idea, we thought we’d go meet a friend at the mall tomorrow,” Keira said. “Olivia, what did you do to the mashed potatoes? They are so rich and creamy!”
“Oh, secret ingredients. A parsnip and cream cheese. I’m glad you like it,” Olivia said.
“Not to get sidetracked,” David said. “Who are you meeting?”
“Trayce,” Jaime fingerspelled and Keira said at once. “We met her online. She goes to school across town and writes fiction.”
“An online friend?” John said. “How well do you know her?”
“We’ve known her for quite a while online and we were all talking about our love of books,” Keira explained. “We decided to meet up at B&N and each of us buy a book for the other two for Christmas. It should take us out of the category of imaginary friends we talked about at Thanksgiving. We can decide if there’s an IRL friendship in the making.”
“You have to be careful about things like that,” Olivia said. “You could be meeting a middle-aged man masquerading as a teen girl. Or a 12-year-old boy.”
“That’s why we’re meeting in a super public place,” Keira said. “With so many people around on the day after Christmas, we should be able to spot a predator. Especially in a bookstore. We aren’t six-year-olds.”
“Keep a line open to us,” David said. “If there’s a problem, I’ll be cruising around.”
“Want to drop us at the mall, Dad?” Jaime signed.
“I walked into that, didn’t I?”
Trayce and Her Mom
“Gosh, Mom! This place is really fancy,” Trayce said when they were seated at the Mayfair Restaurant for Christmas dinner. They arranged themselves at the elegant table, set with a white tablecloth and napkins and a stack of dishes and flatware Trayce wasn’t completely sure how to use.
“It’s a prix fixe three-course meal, but you get a choice for each course. I figured we’d both find something here we like,” Lanie Lombard answered.
“Would you care for a cocktail, ma’am?” the waiter asked.
“No, thank you,” Lanie answered. “I’ll just have water with the meal and coffee with dessert.”
“Same for me,” Trayce said.
The waiter left to get their water and was back in a few minutes with their water and to take their order.
“I’ll have the rutabaga and parsnip bisque and the smoked duck breast,” Trayce said. “I feel adventurous.”
“I’m going all seafood,” Lanie said. “The scallop agnolotti starter and the seared salmon.”
“Excellent choices. I’ll get the starters out right away,” the waiter said.
“Do you suppose there are anything other than excellent choices on the menu?” Trayce giggled. “I love being out with you, Mom.”
“Between the meetings and counseling and having a job where I’m around people again, I’m feeling like a new woman. It still hurts, but I’m not going to let it ruin my life any longer.”
“I’m glad. I saw a new counselor last week, too,” Trayce ventured. “She specializes in teen girl problems. It was nice to… uh… just talk about life and how I respond to situations.”
“She didn’t give you drugs, did she?” her mother asked, alarmed.
“Oh, no. No. We just talked. I’ll probably see her again next week sometime. We left it open.”
“You’re eighteen and have your insurance card. If you need money to help defray the cost, we have money. Just please be careful, dear. Let me know when you’re seeing her again. I’d like the contact information.”
“Okay. Oh, um… One of the things we talked about was me getting out a little more, too. It seems I spend a lot of time online and just in front of my computer writing and don’t have much contact with real people. Most of my friends are characters in my head. So, I’m going to meet a couple of friends at the mall tomorrow for lunch,” Trayce said.
“Do I know them?”
“No. They’re friends from my writing group online. I don’t know them all that well, but we’re meeting at the bookstore to talk about what books we love. I feel pretty safe and confident in the bookstore, so I should be able to spot whether they’re really the people I met or if I fabricated the personalities based on too little information.”
“Well, be careful. I hear so many terrible things about internet friends. I know I’m a Luddite, but I just don’t need to get addicted to the internet now that I’m breaking my addiction to alcohol.”
“Well, you finally got a smartphone, so at least we can keep in touch like that.”
The Christmas dinner was delicious and mostly lighthearted. Even the desserts of tiramisu and chocolate crunch cake was shared and was delightful. Trayce felt she finally had her mother back.
Jaime and Keira and Trayce
«I’m kind of jealous,» Trayce said later that night. «You two always get to be together and I’m kind of a remote… I don’t know what.»
«Satellite,» Keira supplied. «We’ve always wondered what drew you into our orbit.»
«A satellite. That’s not a relationship I’d have ever thought of.»
Jaime and Keira had cleaned up the dishes from Christmas dinner. John and June went home. David and Olivia went to her apartment. Keira had promised her parents she’d be home by midnight.
«When you showed up it was a complete surprise to us,» Jaime said. «We hadn’t been together long and every time we touched, something new in the world opened up to us. When we kissed the first time on Keira’s front porch, we both heard someone sigh and say ‘Wow!’ We didn’t even associate it with you at first. Just thought it was the universe reflecting our own feelings.»
«I remember hearing two people in my head professing their love and then kissing,» Trayce said. «I didn’t know who it was or anything about them, but what I experienced in that first kiss totally took my breath away. Will it be that way tomorrow?»
«We hope so,» Keira said. «But we’re trying not to have expectations so high we can’t possibly meet them. You just kept showing up as we learned more and more about each other. We worked hard at filtering out uninvited mental images and thoughts. Still, when we were absorbed in each other, you were there.»
«Sounds kind of invasive,» Trayce said.
«I think we subconsciously left a door open for you,» Jaime said. «When you joined us the first time we seriously made out with each other, we realized you were special to us.»
«Special how?»
«I believe Keira is my soulmate,» Jaime said. «I can’t imagine a world without her. I care about her so much I’d die for her. And more importantly, I live for her.» Jaime and Keira kissed, bringing Trayce into the depth of their emotion. «When we heard you with us, it didn’t take us long to realize it was possible for us each to have two soulmates. I don’t know if it’s possible to have more than that, but I don’t really want to find out. I feel so complete when you are with us that I can’t imagine a world without you.»
«Jaime, if I write that down, I’ll cry. I thought the two of you would be the most awesome characters I could ever invent. I wanted to write a love story so big it would change the world. And then I let myself get involved in it. The more involved I became, the more real the story was. And the more frightening. I think I was really close to losing my shit all together. Dr. Schwartz told me to block you out and forget that story. He gave me a bunch of keywords and mantras to quote when you were around in my head and you’d disappear. And it sort of worked for a while.»
«How did he give you keywords?» Keira asked.
«He hypnotized me. At least he said he did. I don’t remember ever going to sleep, but I could hear his voice and his lips weren’t moving. Really weird,» Trayce said. «But I couldn’t just quit you. So, I went to see Dr. Rose. She gave me the challenge of proving to myself absolutely whether you are real or not. I’m… really scared to meet you. If you’re there or you’re not there, it says something about me that I don’t think I want to know. But I have to.»
«Honey, we’ll be… I don’t know. We’ll do whatever you need to feel okay. We really can’t do anything else. We love you,» Jaime said.
«Will you just… I know you’re alone and you have a great opportunity to really enjoy yourselves. I know we’d have spectacular orgasms together. But can you just… hold me. Without getting too sexual. Just hold me like you really love me and want me to be with you?»
«Yes, love. But it’s two ways. Hold us. Even though we aren’t literally in your arms, hold us and make us feel how much you care about us.»
«Yes.»
It was a strange evening. Jaime and Keira embraced and shared little kisses, but in their minds, Trayce was with them. She felt their kisses and their arms around her. She imagined giving them little kisses as well. Eventually, they fell asleep.
Keira woke up a little after midnight and quietly kissed Jaime goodnight before she went home. Jaime went to bed. Both felt themselves present in Trayce’s dreams.
All three teens were incredibly excited Friday. They wished they’d made arrangements to meet earlier in the day instead of for lunch. It seemed so silly to need a pretense for getting together.
«We told our parents we met online and were going to meet IRL today,» Keira said.
«I told Mom the same thing. She’s all concerned. I told her she didn’t need to worry. We’d known each other for a long time,» Trayce answered.
«Don’t discount our parents’ concern,» Jaime said. «They care about us and we need to respect that. We aren’t driving to the mall. Dad and Olivia are taking us and they plan to circle around the area in case we need help and call them,» Jaime said.
«What would you need help for?»
«Just in case you’re really a middle-aged predator or a twelve-year-old boy pretending to be a girl.»
«That’s ridiculous. I’m not pretending.»
«We know that, precious. But how can we explain that to our parents?» Keira said.
«We need to get in the car now and might lose contact,» Jaime said. «Being surrounded by metal cuts down on how much we hear from outside.»
«Oh. That’s why it always seems quiet when I’m driving. Okay. I’ll see you there. I will see you, won’t I?»
«We’re on our way.»
The ride in the car was quiet, Jaime and Keira holding hands tensely. David thought they might be having second thoughts, and reached for Olivia’s hand in the front seat. She had gladly agreed to join him and they were going to have lunch at a nearby restaurant. His own thoughts were very pleased. He’d spent Christmas night at Olivia’s apartment and they’d finally gone to bed together. Jaime and Keira focused on blocking out the memories shared by the two of them.
When David pulled up to the curb to drop them off, he admonished Jaime and Keira to call if there was any kind of trouble. They agreed and then dashed to the door of the mall, still holding hands.
«Calling Trayce. Calling Trayce,» Jaime sent out. It was meant to be lighthearted, but they were filled with anxiety. «We’ve arrived and are making our way to B&N. Are you here yet?»
«Ack! I just got out of the car. I’m parked in the farthest corner of the lot. This is a zoo! And I’m so nervous, I dropped my keys. I feel like I’m building myself up to a colossal trauma!» Trayce panted.
«We’re making our way across the mall. Dad dropped us at the other end. We should be there in a couple of minutes, though.»
«I can’t believe we’re actually doing this!» Her thoughts were tinged with anxiety. «I must be crazy! I should leave you as a figment of my imagination.»
«Please don’t run away, sweetie. We’d be heartbroken.»
Hey! Stop! I won’t go! Go away! Go away!! Trayce screamed out in her head.
Her thoughts were suddenly cut off from Keira and Jaime. They stopped where they were in the middle of the mall’s center court.
«Trayce? Trayce, are you all right? Where’d you go? We’re almost to the bookstore,» Jaime called.
«Trayce, please don’t run away from us? Please!» Keira pled.
Only silence responded.
Please feel free to send comments to the author at devon@devonlayne.com.
